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Clients from Hell

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My company does virus removal. We don’t offer warranties (nor does any of our competition) because...

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My company does virus removal. We don’t offer warranties (nor does any of our competition) because all it takes is one click on an email or wrong website, and the computer is reinfected. That’s just part of the cost of running Windows. We allow that if the computer has viruses or pop ups the day after we fix it, it’s possible we just missed something (rootkit, technician error etc), and in that case we’ll do a free follow up.

On the other hand, some people are idiots. This exchange happened six weeks after a virus removal.

Client: I’m just not very happy with the service you provided. You came out (she’s determined it was me personally, even though I don’t take service calls anymore, but I play along) and everything was fine for a couple weeks, then I started getting pop ups again. Now I think I have a virus. And I don’t think I should have to pay again to fix it.

Me: We don’t warrantee virus removal, but I could give you a discount on removing this virus, and hopefully track down where you’re getting them from so you can avoid re-infecting your computer.

Client: But I’ll have to pay again?

Me: Did the computer work properly after I left?

Client: Yes, it was fine for two weeks, then I started getting pop ups.

Me: Ok, well the job was clearly done properly, so it’s possible some of your browsing habits re-infected the computer. However, I can understand how this is a frustrating scenario for you, so I can take 20 dollars off the follow up, or even do it for half price if you drop it off to one of our technicians.

Client: I’m just not very happy with the service. I called Comcast and and they said I shouldn’t have let that guy access my computer, but I don’t think you guys did a very good job.

Me: Hold on, you let someone access the computer?

Client: Yes, a pop-up said it was Microsoft, and I had to call a number.

Me: And you called it?

Client: Yes, and the guy I let on my computer was very nice, but Comcast says he wasn’t really from Microsoft.

Me: So you saw a random pop-up, called the number, and logged the hackers into your computer intentionally?

Client: Yes.

Me: Ok, well clearly that is not something we will cover, we don’t warrantee “I intentionally logged hackers into my computer to install viruses” and we will need to charge you full price to fix that.

Client: Ok, I’ll think about it.


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Source: Clients from Hell

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