Client: Hello, I need help logging into the backend of my server. I don’t know my username.
Me: Sure thing, the username is really easy to remember. It’s just “root.”
I waited a moment while the client tried to log in.
Client: That didn’t work.
I check to see if anything weird has happened, or configured differently, and it all looked normal. I ran a few fixes and attempt to login myself, I get in with no issue.
Me: I’m able to log in fine over here. Are you sure you are using the right password?
Client: Yes, I’m sure!
Me: I don’t see anything that is preventing you from logging in.
Client: Well it isn’t working for me, so you need to fix it.
Me: Okay, I just took a look in the logs, and it appears that you used your email address as the username, you need to login with the username “root”
Client: I thought my email was the root username.
Me: No, the username should just be the word “root”
Client: So what is the username then?
Me: It’s the word “root”
Client: Like my Domain Name?
Me: No all you need to type in is “root”, nothing else.
Client: Just tell me what the username is!
Me: Its root, like the roots of a tree, or a root canal.
Client: Stop playing games and help me out here, what is the username?!
Me: All you need to do is type R then O then another O then T. The word root.
Client: If you aren’t going to be helpful at least don’t repeat yourself!
That’s when he hung up.